Enough HIV AIDS Secracy

The stigma surrounding HIV / Aids lies heavily in the minds of most of those infected with it.  But why do we stigmatise Aids when millions of people have been infected and millions more are affected by it?  There are very few people who haven’t experienced the effects of Aids first hand.  Even some of those who, 10 years ago, might have said “not me” have had to change their tune because everyday it is closer to home, if it hasn’t struck already.

I met families of Aid sufferers who are still sad and frustrated, saying they didn’t do enough because a sister or brother never told anyone they had HIV until the end.  I can understand the fears of rejections but is this good enough reason not to confide in your pastor, your partner or even your parents that you have a terminal illness?  Is there ever going to be a good reason not to disclose your HIV positive status to the people you expect to take care of you and your children when you are too sick to take care of yourself?

Some people living with HIV go to the lengths of changing clinics and doctors when they are sick because they just don’t want to deal with the issue.  Every time they go to a new doctor, they don’t disclose their HIV status.  Money and time is wasted on repeated tests, while no progress is made in dealing with the illness.
Some HIV-positive women fall pregnant just to prove that the “rumours” are not true.  For some silly reasons, some people think that an infected baby will die at birth and that if it lives, then everything is fine.  There is a tendency among some fathers to brag that they are HIV negative just because the woman went ahead and gave birth to a “normal” baby.

What the poor sods don’t know is that some women will never tell a soul and would rather die with their secret – leaving behind sick children and a sick husband – than disclose their status.  I wonder if we shouldn’t rethink the policy of not making Aids a notifiable disease, especially now that millions of unsuspecting people are infected.  Who are we protecting by keeping the secret?
I find it hard to believe that in this day and age there is someone out there who would reject or abuse another human being because they have HIV.  I am not talking about fools.  I am talking about real people who have come to accept that Aids is an incurable disease that doesn’t choose, colour, race, religion or social status.  People have come to accept that there is no reason to point fingers when most of us don’t know our status, or, whether the man or woman lying next to us has had sex without a condom with a secret lover.

Of course we do have bigots everywhere, and these are the people who would fire you from your job if you told them you had HIV.  And those who talk behind your back?  They will always do that, whether you have HIV or not.  Believe you me, they will always find something to nail you with.  But such people are in the minority.  There is a lot of goodwill all round because of the scourge of Aids.
There are hundreds of caregivers who don’t get a cent for the voluntary work they do at hospices caring for [people who have full-blown Aids.  So, when those living with HIV say they don’t want to disclose their status because of the stigma around Aids, what are they talking about?

The few people who have come out and disclosed their HIV status have mostly enjoyed a lot of support from their family, friends, colleagues and even, on occasion, enemies.  These people are envied and admired for their courage and bravery, in taking a stand and de-stigmatising the disease.

The fact that it is against the law for health professionals to disclose patients’ HIV status, even to spouses and family, is going to make the battle against Aids difficult.  This whole cloud of secrecy is sending out a message that says: now that you have it, be ashamed of yourself and keep it to yourself.

And keeping it a secret also means you are going to fight a long hard and lonely battle because those around you won’t feel free to share information with you.  Information that could perhaps save your life.

Zingisa Mkhuma

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